I crossed paths, in a way, with Rachael in the early 80’s w/o knowing it then. When I did know her in the early 90s, we were co-workers and as usual, we compare and contrast our RI upbringings when I found out she was raised in Seekonk, 100 yards to the east of me. She was 19, I 28 and when I mentioned the keg parties in the marshes and woods behind the Daggett ball fields, she lit up.
“I used to party there!” she claims. But she was nearly a good decade younger than me so our paths really could not have crossed, but at least the venue was the same. To this day, the teens still party there.
Rachael was outspoken, brave and fucked up in the head. She was bouncing from apartment to apartment, job to job and romance to romance w/o much of a goal. She was also quite pretty, a gamine which drew me in.
As we continued to speak of party spots on the Seekonk/Pawtucket line, she, quite openly, bravely told me she got fucked by some guy in the Notre Dame cemetery which was next to the Daggett fields.
“I was shit faced, I thought he was cute and you know, we wandered off from the kegger...and it’s really private in there!”
“You’re bad news and dangerous...but pretty as hell.” I thought to myself upon hearing this confession. She seemed a fun but rabid little kitten to play with which may include a serious and worrying bite later on.
The problem with dating at work...or just being interested romantically in another co-worker is that everyone knows it, or will know shortly.
“You better wear TWO condoms if you’re gonna play with her.” Audrey told me one day at work.
“Why? What do you know about Rachael?” I ask.
“Oh, just make sure you’re safe.” And Audrey just trails off w/o an explanation, like women will do to hide their news sources, which is infuriating
One night, I’m alone working, the house is dark except for the glow of the TV and I see Rachael’s car come up the drive. I wonder why she is here at 11pm...she’s not supposed to be working.
In she comes with a fluffy quilt and a small box. The quilt she throws on the floor and from the box, she places three candles on a coffee table by me and lights them.
“I LOVE sandalwood candles!” she tells me.
She then changes the TV station and the plops down into my lap. We had NOT even dated, nor spoken to one another about any attraction. But I wasn’t about to stop her.
She sat there on me and I wrapped my arms around her, we both watching the X Files and occasionally she was slowly, grinding her ass into my crotch and snuggling up close to me.
Another set of car lights comes up the drive. Who the hell is this now? I think. But neither Rachael or I move from the couch or that position.
In comes Alesia, who at one time was a once promising relationship that was “kid-blocked” by her oldest son
“What are you two doing?” she asks, scanning us, the candles and the quilt on the floor. I can see she’s a bit miffed seeing me and her like this.
“Nothing…” says Rachael in a sing-songy voice and stays there in my lap. Rachael had no idea Alesia and I were a thing for a bit in the past.
Alesia tells me she was coming back from some night club in Cranston and wanted to use the bathroom here before her ride home.
I sat there, with this ready-to-go Rachel on my lap and all I could think was...”GET OUT! GET OUT ALESIA! YOU’RE KILLING THE VIBE! OF ALL TIMES TO SHOW UP!”
Eventually, Rachael gets off my lap sighing and goes to do something. Alesia won’t leave the house and Rachael finally just gathers her quilt and candles and leaves, to Alesia’s satisfaction I suppose even though were weren’t dating.
Sigh...so close...
A few days later, I’m talking to Bob, the other guy who works here about what happened.
“What?” he asks, very surprised.
I then ask him what’s up...why was he reacting like that to my story?
“Rachael was here LAST week with me! 1AM and she shows up! She curled up with me and we talked, kept breathing into my ear and running her hands all over my head!”
I then think of Audrey’s admonition to double up on the condoms.
Bob continues...“I thought she was interested, when I started kissing her, she got all weird...then had some sort of panic attack and fled the house.”
I thought a minute, realizing that sounds like Rachael, to flake out for some unknown reason. And she was a flake in my estimation, due to whatever atrocious childhood she had had.
Well, upon learning about her attempts with Bob and the fact the ENTIRE staff is going to learn about this event, I back off Rachael to preserve my job, but I still want her. I know a fun roller coaster ride when I see one. The problem was that pinning Rachael down outside of work wasn’t easy, once I found out about all the others guys who were orbiting her and my slow realization that she was a reckless hot mess even beyond my taste.
No matter though, in less than two months time we both were gone from the job, moving on to other things. She with a newer boyfriend from her Seekonk neighborhood and my wanting to attend Graduate school. Or so I thought. This world is a bus station, people come and they go.
That was 32 years ago.
Today, out of curiosity, I hunt her down on the internet and find her. She had moved all over the place, held numerous jobs and finally ended up married in Texas and had kids of her own, late teens it seems they are now. She did find stability in some way. I suspect Christianity...she had photos of her before a large wooden Cross, at a vista overlooking the Ozark mountains, plus her Facebook feed had “giving it to the Lord” posts. Who am I to disparage what managed to work for her, to steady her life from the bouncing and crashing off walls like she was doing when I knew her.
Good for her.
It took me a minute to recognize her. I saw those eyes, that sort of too sharp nose and thought...”Yep. That’s you! I found you!” Unfortunately, she, like I, have become overweight and worn looking by age. I remember her as a hot looking 19 year old hellcat and I as a guy with a flat stomach and cool looking, but early, salt n pepper hair. It’s nice to be young, huh? It’s nice to be fit, robust and lusty instead of limping. Can you tell I miss my youth? Everyone my age does!
Would we have made it had I pursued her after work came to an end? To out compete those others who wanted her as well? Probably not. She needed to grow up A LOT and I wasn’t keen about her hobby of hopping into other guys beds so easily, (I don’t like sharing women, but have had done it once and disliked it) and maxing out her credit cards and always having less than $400 in her savings account, if she were lucky. But what eyes, what a face...what a body..what a roller coaster!
“C’mon! Let’s do something risky and unplanned! Let’s just have FUN at all costs!” Was I ever addicted to that personality in a girl when I was a young man. I blame you D’Arby! You were the first roller coaster chick I knew and you were better than a bunjee jump into a canyon, with a good chance the cord would snap. I had to have that again n again n again…but meteors blaze out too fast ya know.
An aside about aging…
I once worked at a downtown Providence building when I was 21, as a janitor, an assistant Mr. Fix It to the main guy who kept the place in shape. On the 4th floor, it was staffed with doctors whose job was to go through SSA Disability claims to verify or deny them. One was Dr Phelps, who loved to talk to me.
He was rich, living on the East Side with his politically connected wife and he told stories of that life.
“Ronnie, I’m 58 now...way old..and I got invited the other day to a party on the southern end of Blackstone Blvd...and I tried coke for the first time in my life! My God! I was fifth-teen again! I found the Fountain of Youth! I had energy, vivacity and could conquer the world!” He could see I wasn’t “getting it” and then said, “Well...wait till your 58 and up….you’ll know..you’ll know what THAT will mean.”
Yeah, I do now…
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