Duh!!!!!!!

If there is one thing that really gets under my skin are confident idiots. You've run into them. They can't help but offer you their opinion on subjects they know little about. Not only that, they get fully insulted if you don't agree with them or their supposed abilities.

I don't “suffer fools gladly.” I try not to but if I'm within earshot of some Einstein hosing everyone down with his opinion, I'll have to step in.

So I hear this fool who probably doesn't make more than $30,000 a year bitching that Social Security ought to be privatized, as well as taxes being cut for the rich.

“It's a Ponzi scheme! It's going under! It's running out of money!” he spews on.

I have to get involved in this one I tell myself.

“You want to see it privatized? I say?

“Yeah, I think the gov't ought to give the people their money back and let them handle it as they see best! The gov't doesn't know what it's doing!”

“What if it happened tomorrow? What would you do with your SS money?” I ask.

“Well, I'd invest it! I'd make a good return on it!

“You would?” I ask incredulously

“Yeah, I could pick my own stocks, or hire some firm to do it for me!”

So, it's time to crush this dullard. “You know how to evaluate stocks? What's a PE ratio?”

Not a peep.

“What is “front running, sub-pennying, high frequency trading?” I ask

Again nothing.

I ask, “Do you know why the word “Muppet” and “fiduciary responsibility” are paired together in high finance?”

All I get is a stare.

“Muppets,” I tell him, “were Goldman Sachs description of their high net worth clients who they'd routinely screw. You know what that means? It means the people who hired Goldman to manage their money were being ripped off by the very bankers they entrusted. Goldman would advise these clients to go long on a stock they knew was going down. The bank then would short their own client's stock moves to make a profit. And, it's totally legal.”

Again, the dullard stares at me.

“You honestly think you can outwit, out-trade financial houses like Goldman and any other major bank that deals with stocks?” I ask. You can guess his answer.

Now it's time to switch over to taxation.

“Do you know what a tax haven jurisdiction means, where they're located?”

So he's getting pissed off as I bury him with his own ignorance.

“Do YOU know what that is? I bet you just say these things!” he bellows back.

I reply, “ScotiaBank, Cayman Islands Division.”

“So? What about it? He snaps.

“I applied to them. Did you know I had to come up with a minimum of $100,000 before they'd even talk to me? Guess what. You want to see the rejection letter? IT'S IN MY CAR!”

“Tax haven banks...are for the very rich, not you, not me...the rich. You ok with that? You just fine that a US citizen can create a shell corporation and trade US stocks w/o paying any capital gains taxes? Did you also know, that an IRS court ordered subpoena, to open up your tax haven account, can be completely BLOWN OFF by the nation that hosts your tax haven bank? The IRS can subpoena your account in the Caymans, and the Cayman gov't can tell the IRS to fuck off. The IRS will have no evidence to prosecute you in Federal court!"

"Bain Capital, Mitt's Bain...has 138 sub-companies in the Caymans.  You find that a bit odd that this one company has so much invested in a small Caribbean island? They didn't create these companies because the tanning is wonderful there!"

I go on...

“Yeah, you just trust the rich, business..they won't pork you good...you just believe in them and hand over your assets."

Silence.

I stopped. If I went any further I'd blow an artery or get punched out. Either way, there was no use trying to convince this guy that he, and most of us, cannot compete against the NGO's banks and major players who have better access to finance than we will ever have.

You know what I DON'T do as a matter of course? I don't pontificate on brain surgery. Why? I don't know a damn thing about it! But, how many people do you come across who will?