Bonnie Franklin from “One Day at a Time” is gone. I had no idea she had pancreatic cancer but then what do I know? I don't watch much E-TV to tell the truth. On hearing this, the first memory that came to me was “What a bitch that character Ann Romano was.” This I came to find out was a very old and shallow estimation of that character.

So I Googled the show and the memories came back. I used to watch it fairly regularly after it premiered in 1975 when I was ten years old. I was too young to notice why Valerie Bertinelli was oogled over. Being ten, all I was interested in was my bike and fireworks. I think the main reason I kept watching it was to see apartment supervisor Schneider act like a moron.

“Why did I despise Ann Romano” I wondered? The memories of the show became clearer and I then remembered she was bit of a Hitler as a Mom. Back then I naturally took the sides of her kids because I was a kid then as well. Mom was a strident bitch.

But being ten, I knew nothing of life and why a family like the Romano's would be the way they were. It took decades of seeing other families for me to realize that the Romano's were part and parcel of regular life. You find them everywhere.

As I reread about the show, I forgot how timely it was, even for then. It included controversial topics that every family grappled with but were NEVER spoken of pubically, and forget broadcast TV! One issue that kept coming up that I didn't understand well enough then, was Ann's “at the edge” financial position. She was always working too much, over pressured and always fretting about deadlines. The costs of raising a family on a single Mom's income back then was sketchy and Ann Romano reminded the kids, again and again, of how money doesn't grow on trees.

“Jesus..Ok lady, stop PREACHING!” was my reaction as a child.

You never understand anything until you live it. I can surmise what visiting China might be like, but honestly, it comes no where as close as to seeing it and living it. This I know now. As a kid, I proudly thought I knew many things. I thought I knew more than enough than to be inflicted with Ann Romano's lessons on budgeting.

As the years unfolded for me, I saw many instances of the Romano family. I got to hear them on the phone as a Mom I knew stressed out over a divorce she was going through. She interrupted me to screech at her kids in the background to “CUT THE SHIT!” Her's was a week from hell she wasn't about to have any more stress piled on.

At 18, I listened and waited for J to come downstairs. He had said something to his overworked Mom, as she had just come home from working some low paying factory job and she then went off.  Her voice was like an ice pick in January. It went right through you and she unloaded every ounce of stress her day had brought her onto her son. He never did tell us what he said to her.

I saw another family where the parents complained and griped to their son about going to school or at least find a job. He could've eased the financial burden of running the house. I shot a look at the son and just noticed a 20 year old kid whose self esteem and confidence were in the sewer. He wasn't about to move quickly I thought. They'll be plenty more of this screeching in the coming months I thought as well.

At ten, I really didn't understand what the saying “one day at at time” meant. I do now. I now know why Ann Romano was so strident. She was fighting every day. She, as many of us, are pushed to the cliff's edge and we scratch and scramble back towards safer grounds.